Good Times and the Rhine

Well my first big night out in a foreign land went nicely.

After a few warm-ups at the apartment we headed out into the madness of Johannesfest at around 9pm.

There was plenty of music and dancing and sausages and everyone was having a great time. We met up with Hugh and Graziella and a few of their friends and got some drinks into us. I wasnt keen on wine for the evening, so I went to a "Cocktail Bar" (which was actually a filthy caravan full of hard liquor) and ordered the only drink on the list I recognised, the Long Island Iced Tea.

The only thing I knew about the Long Island Iced Tea is that Phil said they were a very bad idea. Unperturbed, I got a couple in me and waited to see what would happen, teaching Hugh the finer points of the Australian accent in the meantime (I used the example of my brother Jonathan answering the phone in his Dalby voice).



Here we all are. From the left its Graziella the Italian, together with Hugh the Canadian-American. The handsome guy in the middle is Thomas the Greek, who Michelle spent the evening drooling over into her wine. Finally on the right we have Daniel, who is a Swede but talks like a Russian guy bunging on a British accent.

Here are some general photos of the rowdyness: (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

The drinks hit me in a big way around Midnight, but fortunately the Cocktail Winnebago had closed by then. We stumbled to a nearby bar where, figuring the night couldnt be over with only 2 drinks, I ordered a vodka/coke.

At some point I tried to call Barnes. Then I tried to call Dave. Unfortunately instead of calling Dave, I called the guy who has a very similar phone number to Dave, but isnt Dave. This would have to be the 10th time I've called this guy, but the first time from a foreign land. He told me he was glad I was having a good time.



This is Felix, whom I met at the bar. Felix appeared, for all intents and purposes, to be German, but he was yelling something at me about being from South Australia. He then produced the bank note to prove it. He was a top bloke, and organised the bartender to move our drinks into plastic cups so we could leave with them (you pay a deposit for the glasses you use).

After polishing off possibly the strongest vodka/coke ever conceived by man, Michelle and I wandered home (as far as I know).

It was an excellent, if brief, night out.

I woke up this morning regretting every second of it. However, with the spirit of adventure burning bright within, I dragged myself out of bed to see what Europe had in store for me next (actually Michelle dragged me out of bed with the lure of toast).

Around 2 in the afternoon we got our act together and caught a train out to some town on the Rhine for a river cruise.


(it was windy)

After a brief exploration of the cute little town, our boat rocked up and we were off to see Castles.

Turns out all the towns along the river were celebrating the 60th anniversary of something-or-other, and all streets were closed to cars and opened up for bikes. So that was cool.


Here is Michelle demonstrating why she normally wears a hat

Anyway the Castles were suitably high and rocky and imposing. The last stop was St. Something and we grabbed some more delicious German food (apparently the chips are yellow because of the higher quality potatos in Europe, they tasted incredible).

After some shopping we decided to climb a great big hill and run around an old Castle.



Everything was steep and narrow. With a massive hangover and 15kg of water bottles on your back, each step could be your last. The image above does not do justice to what its like to climb those stairs. That scene in the Lord of the Rings where Legolas rides the shield down a flight of stairs shooting arrows at people is complete crap.

But the views were amazing, and it was a bit of a buzz to go running around a 1000 year old building, spraining your ankles on cobblestones that ancient Kings may have sprained their ankles on long ago. There were plently of opportunities for spelunking and taking dramatic photos as well.

Once the Castle closed up, we went back down to the villagers and grabbed a quick meal at a local café then caught the train home.

This has probably been the best day out of the trip so far, once again Michelle has outdone herself. I'm off on Busabout the day after tomorrow, so I'm not sure how thick or fast the updates will be coming to you then. I left my camera cable at home to save weight (good call Ben) so unless I pick up a fresh one at Conrad tomorrow, there will be little in the way of photos coming at you.

For now I'll leave you with another taste of German music.

From the Hip-Hop fraternity, we have Sido with Slechtes Vorbild, which believe it or not is extremely catchy.

And just for Alex, we have Nevada Tan - Vorbei, one of the hundreds of German nu-metal bands that all sound like Linkin Parks first 2 albums.

"Ever see a man say goodbye to a shoe?"

First and foremost, a shoe update.



Yes, I know, they're not pretty. They have that Pakistani Exchange Student look written all over them. However they are extremely comfortable, and cost me something like 30 euros.

They definately made my tour of Frankfurt a lot easier, although I'm still a really crappy tourist. Where Michelle would hit up the Tourist Information Desk and arm herself with pamplets, schedules and a list of things to see, Im still just wandering around and checking out whatever is around the next corner.

Fortunately in Frankfurt I stumbled across some reasonably interesting stuff. First, a giant cathedral:


They're keen on Jesus over here

Then, an modern art exhibition:


(...yeah)

Michelle told me Frankfurt was a very business oriented kinda city, the kinda place where the town motto is C.R.E.A.M, and that became obvious early on. First there was this:


All hail our leader, the almighty dollar

Then this:



Somehow its hard to picture having a rough one at Mary Street, then chundering in the back seat of a 7 series on the way home. Maybe this is the Silver Service.

My good luck ran out when a massive storm rolled in and drenched me. Tired, wet, and sore, I did a little bit of wander through the main shopping district, then caught the train back to Mainz.

That night Michelle and I went to dinner at the home of some of her lab heads. It was all very surreal because it felt like I was hanging out with a bunch of my parents mates, just drinking wine and reminiscing about the good old days before the kids came along and ruined everything. The only difference was that half the conversation was in German.

Today we went to Johannesfest, which is like the Ekka only they set it up all through the middle of town. We got rained on, again, and browsed endless stalls of knockoff jewellery.



I think we're going back in an hour or so, altho this time we'll be powered by Jager Bombs made with the Aldi equivilent of Red Bull

In other news, German MTV is wearing thin. They literally run 10 ringtone ads in each break, one after the other. Its maddening. German music is pretty cool though, go get yourself some Heul Doch.

Nothing Special

Thanks for the hair comments guys, you are my everyday source of inspiration.

I don't have any photos for you today, but I'm bumming around in Michelles lab so I thought I'd update regardless.

Caught a train to a town called Wiesbaden yesterday, which is apparently the Shelbyville to Mainz's Springfield. Due to my fiercly independant nature (aka hopelessly disorganised) I breezed past the tourist information counter as usual and decided to explore on my own.

I have a rough system of walking 3 or 4 blocks in one direction, then turning left and going 6 or 7 and so on. Fortunately the town is laid out like a little German Canberra so I couldnt get very lost.

The place actually looked like San Francisco (from what I've learned playing Grand Theft Auto) with lots of orderly elevation changes lined with identical old houses. The main shopping zone was huuuggee, and jam packed with designer sneakers and the European equivilent of David Jones.

Speaking of sneakers, I think I'm going to cop some new ones. Maybe some kind of Cross Trainer/Evo driver shoes. My DC's look fabulous, but they really give your feet a caining after a while. I havent met any guys at Footlocker that speak english yet, but they all speak Hip-Hop and Ive compiled a repotoire of shoe related Jay-Z lyrics that should see me through.

Last night we went to an Irish Pub called the Porter-House for a trivia night with some more biologists, a lawyer, and a couple of randoms. Our team, "Vas Ist Los?" came second, and won 20 euros off our bar tab. The cheating was rampant, Im talking mobile phone Wikipedia here. I had an Apple Cider and some Wokas, and spent most of the night discussing the lack of decent cars in Germany with Alix. He told me he wants to come to Australia and buy an R33. I told him I know just the fella...

Tonight we're having dinner with a Canadian guy called Hugh, and tomorrow I might go to Frankfurt for a laugh.

Oh, and apparently there are no arcades in Germany. Thats probably why you never see them smiling.

Wine and Wheels - My World is Pain

Yesterday myself, Michelle and a bunch of biologists took a bike journey out of Mainz to a wine-tasting event at a nearby vineyard.



We rode along the banks of the Rhine for about 15 kilometers, then through a picturesque little town and some amazing country scenery before arriving at a ranch-style house with a heap of drunk Germans.

The ride there nearly killed me, so I was glad to rest my numb legs and have a refreshing glass of Schtillvasser, which is the German word for non-carbonated water. They look at you like you're crazy when you ask for it too. "Schtillvasser? Like, from a tap? In a glass? Oh you crazy Australian"

Michelle and I knocked back a couple of Vine Schulers (2 euro's each) and soaked up some sun. I ordered myself a Grillesteak mit Brochen (3 euros), and got exactly that. Steak and a breadroll, no sauce, no vegies, no slice of lemon, nothing. Perfect, I love this country.



I think it was around 6 or 7 before we decided to head home (still 2 or 3 hours of sunlight left in the day). The ride back was absolute agony, and even today I still cant sit down without painful bike flashbacks.

Today I went for a bit of a wander through town, practising how to lose and find myself over and over again. I used the almighty Mainz Cathedral as a point of reference, which is handy because you can see it from absolutely anywhere. If you're ever lost, just scan the horizon for a picture of Jesus and walk towards it.

I'll probably try and hit some museums or something tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that and so forth. There isnt a terrific amount to do here (at least until I find an arcade) and busabout doesnt kick off for another week or so.

The weather, as always, is unimportant.

Mainz

The flight from Singapore to Frankfurt was delayed in pretty much every way possible. First, we couldnt leave cos the pilots needed updated maps to be faxed from Sydney to Singapore. Then when they arrived, Singapores fax machine had run out of toner. Then after 12 hours of flying around bad weather in the Agean sea or something, someone had nicked our parking spot in the Frankfurt terminal.

Finally on the ground in Germany, I walked through the VERY VERY QUIET Frankfurt airport (it looks like the U2 clip for Beautiful Day, seriously), navigated a maze of escalators and trains that depart every 240 seconds between different buildings, and finally made it onto the U-Barn out of the airport and towards Mainz.

Everything was going perfectly and I was very proud of my efforts, I had even got to flex some grade 8 German on a ticket officer dude. So it was disappointing when I finally arrived in Mainz and discovered that the mobile number I had for Michelle wouldnt connect.

After an hour of wandering around town trying to look natural while working out what the hell to do, I finally bailed up some German lady who spoke a little English at the customer service counter of some random important looking business. She pointed out that I had written the first two digits of Michelles phone number in the wrong order, so soon enough I got through to her and she arrived on a big blue bicycle in true European style. She bought me a phone (for 10 euros), email me if you want the number

Yesterday we did some shopping, and picked up a true European bounty for EU26.97, part of which is seen here:

A mere 10 of those Euros went towards the bottle of Jager (found on the shelf next to the cereal), we also got a free Ice Bucket. I celebrated by knocking back a refreshing glass of "Schwip Schwap", which seems to be Fanta mated with Coke mated with the leftovers of the self-serve tray at Sizzler. I also picked up this fancy watch.

Slept for a good 12 hours. Apparently today we're going on a 20km bike ride to a winery with Michelles lab supervisors. Noone has explained to me how we're supposed to ride back when we're drunk off our asses. And just to add an element of danger, Ive been loaned a very expensive looking bike on which to make the journey.

and were off

I have landed in Singapore and located the free Internet.

Flight was pretty uneventful. I set some incredible scores in Tetris and watched Shooter (starring Mark Wahlbergs biceps).

Things went downhill on our descent, when the right half of my face went through explosive decompression due to my sinuses or whatever being blocked up.

I was feeling sorry for myself until the 4 year old asian kid 2 seats to my left unleashed an amazing David Bryant-esque stream of nausea all over her mothers leg. I did the honorable thing of snatching my bag off the floor and tucking my knees into my chest.

Im off to find the connecting terminal or wherever the hell my next plane is leaving from. All the security guards here look disturbingly legit. As opposed to the retired PE teachers we have back home, these guys have hats and nightsticks. They are very very small tho. Comedy small.

the juice is loose

watch this space


seems alright so far